Wednesday, September 03, 2003

5:20 pm
uhnnnnn.... stupid stupid overwhelming ap world history among other things. my day:
7:10-7:50 AM~ woke up, puttered around, dressed, finished making lunch, cooked eggs, etc.
7:55-8:10 AM~ drove to school
8:10-8:15 AM~ stood w/ lizzie, martha, rachael, etc. etc. that crowd.
8:15-8:20 AM~ got stuff in my locker, walked down hall to ms. R's rm
8:20-9:55 AM~ had math test... easy. afterwards, read RoTK, listened to peoples talking... yep.
9:55-9:57 AM~ walked to locker and got AP WH book
9:57-10:00 AM~ walked downstairs to rm. 403
10:00-11:32 AM~ AP world... he talked and talked and talked and stuff... we scribbled notes as fast as we could possibly scribble (v. disorganized mind you)... jen and AJ and palmer and maggie and alex, etc. etc. yeah anyway, their group, presented on hellenistic greece and did well, but more notes (although they had already written out the outline, thanks guys:D), etc... figured that our group has lotsa work to do tomorrow, dang. oh yes, question- why is it that all the religions we are learning about stressed that enjoying life and having no worries were key principles? or at least philosophies at least? cause school is bound to have stresses, esp. for moi. growl.
11:32-11:35 AM~ walked to art w/ lizzie, discussing the overwhelmed look i gave her in AP W and why she was feeling sorry for me (wow! she was feeling sorry for me!)
11:36-1:08 PM~ talked w/ jasmine, michael, and eric and worked on the gridding thing... my photo turned out well!
1:08-1:11 PM~ walked to my locker, met laura and megs, got my lunch
1:11-1:12 PM~ walked from locker to cafeteria with L and M
1:12-1:38 PM~ dismayed to find that seniors stole our table for lunch since it's raining!! NO! gather in booths and stuff (which is not as enjoyable) and hatched plan to get it back (hehe... jk seniors, jk.)... discussed the strange events that possibly took place on rache's behalf. hrm. :)
1:38-1:42 PM~ walked from cafeteria to locker to get bookbag
1:42-1:45 PM~ walked from locker to front of school to get on dr. ed bus
1:45-1:48 PM~ waited in front of bldg. for bus
1:48-2:05 PM~ drove to dr. ed place
2:05-2:55 PM~ had classroom w/ ms. J... whoo hoo
2:56-3:18 PM~ onstreet w/ mr. J (i have a feeling they're married) & kyle, did better than last time- on to lesson 2, dear god help. wasn't as nervous though.
3:18-3:38 PM~ kyle drove
3:38-4:05 PM~ waited in sim. room for bus to come
4:05-4:50 PM~ rode bus home
4:50 PM~ arrive home
4:50-5:00 PM~ drink orange juice, complain to mom about ap world
yeah.... now this. sorry that was a bit long winded and boring but i needed to get it out. MUST NOT GET OVERWHELMED, CLAIREY. wow, this is something my grandma sent me:
(written by a church's assoc. pastor)
Floating
As many of you know, I recently went on my annual Sabbath retreat with some of my friends from theology school. We rented a house in Destin and together created a rhythm of worship and reflection, rest and play. It was a wonderfully restorative and renewing time for us all. We would spend a couple of hours down at the beach each day, and I found myself in the water a good bit of that time. More specifically, I found myself floating. I would lie back, arms and legs outstretched and face to the sun. My ears would be beneath the surface so that all the sounds above would be drowned out by that sort of underwater hum. And I would just
close my eyes and float along on the waves and ripples until one would break on me and upset my balance. In those floating moments, I experienced a profound peace and joy that's hard to describe other than to say it literally felt divine. For I had this sense that the water and the sunshine were not just water and sunshine,
but were the love of God, surrounding me and holding me and carrying me along on its rhythms. In a way I had never experienced before, my whole body and soul surrendered to the invitation, "Be still and know that I am God." I found myself whispering, "I know." A week later, I found myself sitting in my spiritual director's office talking about an area of my life where I have had trouble trusting God lately. She said to me, "You know, maybe part of your prayer can be that you ask God to help you stop swimming so hard and just float." The images, the sensations, the words all came flooding back to me and streaming down my face. I said, "I know." I do know. I know that God is like the sea and that the sea can be trusted to hold me up and carry me where I need to go. I know that the invitation of the spiritual life is to completely surrender to God, to stop swimming and just turn over and float. But I forget so easily. In a world that screams "Go . . . do . . . run," it's really hard to hear the voice that says, "Be still," much less to heed it. Far more often than not, my thinking, my working, even my praying feels like swimming, trying to get somewhere, to achieve something, to earn my place in God's heart. I have trouble remembering that I am already there and that God invites me to just rest in that. What about you? Ever feel like you're swimming hard without getting anywhere? Do you long to experience God's peace and assurance in your life? Then God is extending an invitation: Be still. Come to me, all who are weary and carrying heavy burdens. Sound like you? Know that I am God. And I will give you rest. What an amazing promise, an offer too good to refuse. Now just lie back, breathe deeply, and float. The sea can indeed be trusted.
~AYMEN!~
love,
C

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